


Displaced

by missema



Series: In Modern Kirkwall [3]
Category: Dragon Age, Dragon Age II
Genre: Adulthood, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Coming of Age, Dragon Age AU, Dragon Age Kink Meme, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Growing Up, Love, New Adult, Outdoor Sex, Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-15
Updated: 2012-10-07
Packaged: 2017-11-10 01:21:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 18,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/460654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missema/pseuds/missema
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After leaving university, Bethany feels displaced as she takes her first job 'grown up' job in Kirkwall.  She's still trying to find a place between her past and present when she meets Keran, and the two fall in love.</p><p>Takes place in Modern Kirkwall series, starting before the events of At the Viscount's Keep</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meeting

**Author's Note:**

  * For [seimaisin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/seimaisin/gifts).



It was a sunny, warm day out, just at the end of summer, warm enough to remind her too much of the heat they'd suffered for the past few months.  Normally, there was no good reason for Bethany to come to work on her days off, but she'd been bogged down in work at the architectural firm where she'd been hired.  It was as if they wanted to show their newest junior associate just how busy they could be, so they heaped the work onto her.  Truly, she didn't mind, and she did enjoy her work so, and she wanted to do well, the need to please ran deep within her.

It wasn't as if she had much else to do anyway.  Her mother and brother, with whom she lived, were both out, Carver with his girlfriend Merrill and her mother at one of her various charity events or else helping her elder sister, Norina who was planning her move back to Kirkwall.  She supposed she might have tagged along with Mother, or called up a friend to go out, but Beth was at a loss for what to do for most of the summer until she started working on the weekends.  

Though she'd grown up in Kirkwall, she'd left for college and felt displaced amongst her old friends at home.  Work provided a respite that she desperately needed and she threw herself into it, taking pleasure in learning and having her first real job.  She wanted to save up for a place of her own, not a shared apartment like she'd lived in for the last few years.  Roommates always wound up ending badly for her, and more than once she'd been forced to ante up money to cover expenses that she'd been left with.

Waving at a colleague she knew my face and not name, she made her way through the silent office to her desk.  The day before she'd been out at a site, going between the construction workers and her client, which wound up working out well after some initial discord, but she'd been able to smooth it all over.  Unfortunately it left her desk in a lamentable state and she flipped on the light to reveal new plans, product samples and mail strew across her normally pristine workspace.  She sighed as she gave them a cursory glance, putting the items aside so she could first check her email.

The bell rang as she worked and at first she didn't get up, but then realized with just a few other people in and out, she might well be the only person in the front of the building.  There were no administrative staff here on the weekends, though the office manager and some of the accounts payable workers did come in if they had extra work.  Bethany heaved another sigh at the interruption, but began a quick walk to the front door at the second clang of the bell, resenting the interruption that drew her out of her work.

Venturing into the front office, she peered out of the glass reception window before she approached, to see who it was before she opened the door.  The man there was wearing a shirt emblazoned with the logo of a messenger service they often used. Still, she didn't know this man and was glad that they had a reception window, and after fumbling about the desk in front, she found the key and unlocked and slid the window open.

"Hello, miss."  The young man said brightly.  "Wasn't sure if anyone was going to be in today, but these came in urgent, so I thought I'd try."

"A few of us are here."  She said, taking in his appearance.  He was tanned, but hair hair the color of straw and bright blue eyes were warm instead of icy.

"Right you are.  I've got two packages for you, well, two deliveries."  He amended, taking out two cardboard tubes that could only be full of blueprints.  "Just need a signature."

He slid the packages through the window and then handed over a clipboard for her to sign, watching as her slender fingers took each item from him.  She scrawled her name across the signature slot on the page, noting that he'd already written in the company name for her.

"Sorry, what does this say?"

"Bethany Hawke."

"It's nice to meet you, Bethany Hawke.  I'm Keran."  He said, smiling at her.

"Nice to meet you too."  She said automatically, but was looking at the cardboard delivery tubes, searching for a recipient name.  "They must be for Allen."  She muttered to herself, thinking of the big project her boss was working on.  Though she'd only been there for a few weeks, he always seemed to be working on 'something big' according to him.  Time would tell if it was anything big at all.  

"Are you always here or do you work part time?"  Keran asked, breaking through her thoughts.  "I've never seen you before."

"Well, I just started a few weeks ago.  New job and all that.  I've a lot to learn."  Bethany answered.

Keran nodded sagely, as if she'd said something really interesting and enlightening.  "Still learning the ropes, eh?  Don't work too hard, Bethany Hawke."  He said, walking back towards the door with a wave.  "Have a good day."

"You too."  Bethany called but he was already out the door again, getting onto the bike he'd propped up against the building.  Bethany eyed him through the window, looking at his toned body as he pulled on his delivery satchel and sped away, down the historic streets of Kirkwall, with their crumbling grey stone.  She saw him whiz by a pedestrian and out of view in no time, leaving her standing there in the darkened office with the packages in her hands.

And just like that, she forgot about him, their interaction inconsequential and mundane.  Forgot about him until his name came up, unexpectedly a few days later.


	2. Macha

The bell above the door jangled as Bethany left the shop, stopping for just a moment to rummage through her old canvas bag and pull out a pair of sunglasses. Merrill, her brother's girlfriend, had come with her, and the two of them were going to get lunch at one of her favorite restaurants in Kirkwall. Though she hadn't gone out of the Free Marches during her time at University, she'd missed the city. There were few cities as big as Kirkwall, and she thought the seclusion and quiet would suit her more than it had. Born and raised in a bustling city, she found the slower pace hard to adjust to, and hadn't thought about going any place but home once she'd finished her degree.  
  
Merrill was chatting easily about nothing of consequence in her happy little way that Bethany found so endearing. She hadn't much in common with Carver's girlfriend, who was a graduate student in biology described to be an eccentric genius by all those that knew her work, but she did like her very much. They both were shopping, with Bethany searching for more suitable clothes for work and Merrill tagging along, picking up a few odd things on sale. It seemed to Beth that she spent a good quarter of her paycheck buying suitable clothes, ensuring that she wasn't endlessly borrowing things from her mother, though she appreciated that they were nearly the same size and build. It was another way in which she felt displaced, like all of her old things didn't quite work anymore, her old suits seemed too dated and worn, even her casual clothes felt in need of an update. Maybe it was just her, the fact that she didn't feel like she fit in the clothes anymore, as if they were part of a persona she didn't know anymore, an old skin to be shed.  
  
Whatever the reason was, she was glad she lived with her mother for the time being. There was an art to building a wardrobe of working, sturdy pieces and without the money she was saving on rent, it would be much harder to pay for things. The downside was that she lived at home with her mother, Carver and Merrill, and all of them had their own lives that she felt like she was intruding on. Merrill was the only one that seemed to make time specifically for Beth, though she hoped when her older sister returned home they would grow close again.  
  
It was hard to be apart from her for so many years, and Nori's had gone away to school, first to Ferelden and then to Orlais for graduate studies. Recently it had been her busy job within the Assembly, their governmental structure of the whole Free Marches that their father had also served in that demanded much of her, disintegrating the fragile remnants of connection between the two sisters. It seemed like Nori was destined to recreate their father's glory in politics, and spent much of her time working and writing, publishing articles and books, writing the foreword to a biography of their deceased father, Malcolm. Beth believed that Nori still mourned their father, and worked her endless hours in a sort of tribute, for the two of them had been very close, though he had been dead for years.  
  
"Shall we stop here for lunch? I know it's one of your favorites." Merrill asked, pulling her from her thoughts. The petite woman was peering at Bethany from behind a bouquet of cut flowers she'd just bought. Flowers and plants were Merrill's favorite gifts and Bethany knew those were meant for someone else, as Merrill had taken great care in selecting the blooms that she now carried in a glass vase.  
  
They were stopped in front of a small bistro that was serving lunch, with several tables of guests eating on the patio in the fine weather. It was pleasantly warm with a cool breeze from the rains the night before. The restaurant was a favorite of hers since coming back to Kirkwall, though she hadn't visited for many months. Bethany squinted at the stand that held the menu, scanning the list for dishes suitable to Merrill's vegetarian diet, making sure that she correctly remembered that they did serve food she could eat. In a chair, a heavily pregnant hostess sat behind the podium, a waitress chatting with her. The sunlight glinted on the pregnant woman's golden hair, and she looked radiant, though tired, as gabbed animatedly with the black-clad woman next to her. Nodding at Merrill, Bethany walked towards the podium, the two women behind it turning their attention to them immediately.  
  
"Oh you look ever so pretty!" Merrill exclaimed, smiling warmly at the hostess.  
  
"Why, thank you." The woman replied in a cheery voice. "It's been a while since we've seen either of you." She said displaying the memory for faces and details that bartenders and waitresses seemed to have exclusively.  
  
"I suppose it has." Bethany said, considering. She hadn't been out much since getting a job, and before she'd been too worked up about money to dine out much. "Congratulations." She remarked, nodding towards her heavy belly. It was always somewhat awkward for Bethany, who loved children and wanted several of her own one day, but didn't like making more than congratulatory comments when others were expecting. It struck her as rude that so many liked to ask deeply personal questions to pregnant women as if they were public property.  
  
The hostess, who wore a small silver tag that gave her name as "Macha" beamed at the felicitations. "Thank you, miss. How have you been?"  
  
"Just fine. Working at a new job and all of that, but I'm learning a lot."  
  
"Where is it your working now?"  
  
"I'm an architect." Bethany said proudly. "I've just started at Harimann and Anderson."  
  
"They've just done that new main library building, the big one with the huge pillars outside." Macha said knowingly. "My brother Keran does deliveries for them sometimes and he was out there to see it before it opened. He came home absolutely crowing about it, though I haven't been down to see it yet."  
  
Bethany perked up, recognizing the name at once. "I think I met him the other day! He's a bike messenger, right?" Macha nodded. "Yes, he came by with some new plans for us. Lucky him, I had just joined when the library opened, so I didn't get to see it beforehand. It's a great design, incorporating modern and the traditional grey granite of Kirkwall."  
  
Macha expertly cut Bethany off before she could really get going, the waitress at her side bobbing impatiently on one foot, shuffling the menus she'd pulled out. "It's been nice to see you again and chat a bit. Your table is ready. I'll tell my brother I saw you...what's your name again?"  
  
"Bethany. Bethany Hawke." Macha nodded, smiling them away from her.  
  
"Enjoy your meal." She called after them.  
  
As they were led to their table, Beth glanced back at the girl. The resemblance between brother and sister was unmistakable now that she knew about it. They shared the same hair and eyes, and probably the same complexion, though Keran was somewhat tan from his time working in the sun. It was strange that she would run into Macha, knowing nothing about the woman just days after meeting Keran.  
  
There were a few things that Bethany didn't believe in, and coincidence was one of them. It appealed to the sense of mystery in her, the part that liked figuring out puzzles and interconnectedness. Though she had no idea what significance was held in meeting both Keran and his sister a few days apart was to her, she filed it away as significant, though perhaps not important.


	3. Of All the Bars in Hightown

  
Keran sat in a darkened bar in Hightown, the kind of place that pretended to be an authentic pub when it really wasn't, serving designer microbrews and ornate salads on square plates to their upscale clientele. Despite the pretension of the place, he liked it, and sat quietly at the polished mahogany bar, slowly eating the large lunch of hamburger and fries, an iced tea and two glasses of water. Lunches were two hours long, to allow him to have a chance to rest and get out of the sun, and eat without giving himself a cramp when he got back on his bike to finish his deliveries.  
  
There was less expensive fare to be had, for certain, but the atmosphere couldn't be beat. Relaxing music trembled from hidden speakers, and the tables near the windows had couches instead of chairs, he found that he liked the decor, not that he consciously thought of it that way. When asked, he cited the whole effect that the place had as the reason he liked it, the clean lines and dark woods, beige armchairs and ceiling to floor white curtains over equally large windows, all more expensive than anything he could afford.  
  
The food was a treat for himself, because he'd finished his summer courses and exams. The lunch was extravagant, an expenditure he'd normally have shunned for cheaper, quicker food, but he would be able to pick up more days of work and reasoned that he could make up the money for one lunch. He was twenty-four years old, and had nearly completed his undergraduate degree in economics. One day soon, he'd finish university and make some real money, though his job as a messenger was more than enough for the summer. It paid better than anything on campus and he got to be out and enjoy the warm weather, even if he was working. He had plans for his future, ambitions that fueled him, and even though his family lived modestly at the moment, he had no intention of it going on forever.  
  
He still lived with his mother in the house where he'd grown up. It was in an older part of Kirkwall that was experiencing a surge of gentrification, and old warehouse buildings were being turned into lofts and boutiques, next to the old grocery that had been run by the same family for seventy years. With his father long out of the picture, he'd grown up close to Macha and his mother, though both had a tendency to baby him. Macha was seven years his senior and had taken care of him throughout his life, the two of them often alone while their mother worked. The past, for all its hardships always made him smile, he loved his family and wanted to make them proud.  
  
"Hey Keran, how's it going, man?" He turned at the voice, a petite woman dressed in functional all black clothes and an apron, with short, spiky hair and horn-rimmed glasses was speaking to him.  
  
"Can't complain. Nice to see you again, Dee. I'll tell Davey I ran into you." Davey was his brother-in-law, Macha's husband. He'd been making food deliveries to this restaurant and a few others for years, before he'd been hurt on the job a couple of months ago, getting to know Dee and her staff fairly well. Dee managed the restaurant and often asked after his brother-in-law, checking up on him. It was through his job that Davey met Macha, who worked in a smaller bistro downtown.  
  
"How's he doing?" She asked.   
  
"Better, he's going to physical therapy now. He's been working a few days a week doing paperwork stuff in the office. He hates it though, hates sitting."  
  
"I bet he does, when you're used to being on your feet, sitting down all day is no better than a cage. I've got to go, there's a private party coming in soon, but tell Davey and Macha I said hi, okay? And let me know when the baby comes." She said quickly, slipping away from him. Keran nodded at her back, finishing up the remains of food on his plate after she left.  
  
He felt the need to get out of the dark, air conditioned bar, no longer content to linger. More people were coming in for lunch, ruining the illusion of solitude that had given him a chance to think. Gathering up his bag, Keran waited for his check, impatient fingers drumming against the wood. The clank of porcelain plates and silverware, the ringing clink of empty glasses, the din of voices and increased speed of the servers marked the lunch hour in full swing as he paid and left. A group of people in suits and dress shoes pushed past him into the restaurant as he opened the doors, letting his eyes adjust momentarily to the sunlight.   
  
An attractive, dark-haired young woman was walking towards where he stood, apparently lost in thought, and Keran watched her, a slow smile forming on his face. She was wearing white dress pants and a blue and white striped button down shirt, almost as if she'd be more at home on a boat instead of inside at lunch. With her red lipstick and raven hair cut chin length, she looked timeless, as if she could be a beautiful woman from nearly any moment in history. While he thought her more than pretty, there was something interesting about her, a depth of intelligence, intellectual and emotional, but a feeling he got from her, that made her seem almost fragile, as if she were working hard to find the answer to a question she didn't yet know.  
  
"Bethany! Bethany Hawke." He called out to her, mimicking the way she'd first told him her name, she looked up and waved at him. Macha had said that she'd run into her at work the other day, and that she'd remembered Keran. It was strange, the way she stuck out in his mind as well. Of all the people he knew and could bump into, meeting her was one of the better options, and it wasn't just for the smile that she was bestowing upon him as she drew closer.  
  
"You haven't brought me any deliveries recently!" Bethany said to him as she approached. "I was beginning to wonder if you were avoiding us."  
  
"Never." Keran said stoutly, flirting back at her. "I've been on the other side of town this week."  
  
"Is that what you're doing here?"   
  
"Nope. Just lunching."  
  
Bethany sighed, a little distracted. "I wish I could _just_ have a lunch. If I'm not working through mine, then I have to come to events like this, where I stand around and wait for people to talk to me. I feel like I have to work nonstop to prove myself, and it's getting tiresome."  
  
"Just enjoy the free food." Keran advised, and Beth gave a short hoot of laughter. He liked the sound of it, slightly unrefined and raucous, the kind of laugh he didn't think she let too many people hear.  
  
"It'd be better if I could have lunch with you instead." She sighed. He searched his mind for an appropriate response, but before he could form anything, the mobile phone in her hand buzzed, interrupting them. She looked down at it, grimaced and then gave him a sheepish smile as she ignored the call. "I need to go in."  
  
"Alright." Keran said, still a little thrown by her last statement, but flattered by her interest. "It was, um, good to see you again." He stammered, looking at her distracted face.  
  
"You too." She said, flashing him a quick smile. He scrambled to open the door for her, and she gave him another warm smile before she walked in.  
  
Unlocking his bike from where he'd left it, Keran couldn't think clearly, but had to tamp down the desire to go back into the restaurant. If only he hadn't already eaten, he could sit and watch her, maybe get her to come and talk with him for a while. He should have asked her for her phone number or something, her phone was right there, and he berated his own stupidity. Instead he'd gawked at her, awkward and stammering as he held the door open. At least he thought she liked him, that sure wasn't the kind of comment that just gets thrown out there.  
  
As he rode past the window of the bar, he could see her from the side, as she stood in a group of people, moving her hands as she talked. It seemed so far from his world, but knowing that she would prefer to have lunch with him made him almost giddy, happy, as if he knew a secret no one else did.


	4. A Party in Lowtown

  
  
  
He still had his chance meeting with Bethany on his mind at the end of the week when an old neighborhood face told him about a house party. Keran didn't run into many people, busy as he was normally, but with classes over, he found himself with large, new expanses of free time between one working shift and the next, and was seen around more often. Running errands for his mother, Keran saw and talked to a guy called Cook, that was always called Cook, though it was neither his first nor his surname. In his slightly Antivan accented speech, he outlined all of the new business dealings he was part of, while inviting Keran to a party on the outskirts of Lowtown.  
  
Cook was the type of person who had been born with an old face and large, droopy dark eyes, making it impossible to pinpoint his true age. If Keran hadn't been in school with him since their early years, he would never know him to be in his early twenties. A perpetual schemer with ambitions in music and production that never seemed to pan out, he invited Keran to a party at his rented house, which he was sharing with a few of his latest performers. Without plans for Friday night, it seemed a better idea than to sit at home with Davey and Macha, and Keran accepted without intending to stay for long. He knew those parties, overstuffed with people in run down houses with dirty walls and grain alcohol mixed with sugary sweet fruit juice in cheap plastic cups, the main draw being the live music.  
  
He wasn't far off when he got to the house, but Cook had the foresight to bedeck the backyard with blinking lights and chairs, easing the crowding of the interior. As he filtered through the party, sipping a weak, watery lager he'd been handed upon arrival, there were a few faces he knew from around, and he stopped to talk to people he hadn't seen very often, but always seemed to be around. A loud, bass-heavy song began with a female voice singing over it, the throb catchy, and he found himself bobbing along to the beat. Keran gave one-armed hugs to girls he'd lusted after in high school, to guys he had played football with in junior high. This was a very neighborhood crowd, and it made him feel unexpectedly at ease, though he was sure that the liquor did its part.   
  
Meandering through the house, he searched for a place to sit, eventually reaching a room away from the performed music, filled with people lounging on pillows and couch cushions, the couch itself curiously missing. He drank a second and third beer, talking idly to a girl whom he sort of remembered, but definitely didn't know her name. Listening with only half of his attention, he drank his beer as he nodded at the girl. Keran could hear Senestra before he saw her, his ears perking up at the familiar, gravely pitch of laughter that came from too many cigarettes against a naturally throaty voice, a deeply alluring sound that made his skin prickle with recognition.   
  
The Tevinter woman had lived near him for a time, moving with her mother and stepfather while he was in high school. They'd gotten together the summer after graduation, and he somehow had been drawn back into her for years until he just couldn't take it any longer. Two years had passed since he'd last seen her for more than a moment, and he was surprised that he felt almost nothing besides a wary dread. No lingering affection, no desire to be back with her, as he had held onto for years, but just a tired feeling that he really didn't want to face at the moment.  
  
Around him, the music was softer as people passed around a bong, lounging casually, becoming more relaxed as it circled around. The girl next to him grew quiet after her hit, and he guessed their conversation was over. When it came around to him, he declined, knowing that his company would likely have a surprise drug test the day after he smoked up. He could still hear Senestra outside the door, looming, caging him in without knowing he was in there. Keran decided to get up and go into the room where people were dancing, hoping Senestra wouldn't follow, and there was certainly less chance of falling asleep.  
  
"I thought I'd kissed those lips before. Nice to see you, Keran." Senestra said as he'd tried to slip by her.   
  
"Senestra. You look good." Keran said, not bothering to respond to her first statement. She did look good, but in the slightly ragged, edgy way she always did. Her naturally reddish hair was dyed black with a streak of cobalt blue in the front. It made her pale skin ethereal in the dim, smokey light of the house, and she was dressed in a tank top and jeans, the tattoos decorating her arms standing out. "New ink? Looks good." Keran asked, pointing at a design on her shoulder that hadn't been there the last time he'd seen her naked. He cringed inwardly at his overuse of the word 'good' but he was having trouble bringing other adjectives to mind.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. I got it a couple of months back." She said, smiling up at him. The girl she'd been talking to had vanished, leaving them alone.  
  
"Gonna go get another drink." Keran mumbled.  
  
"I'll come with." Senestra said and he shrugged, not sure of how to get rid of her. At one time he'd though himself in love with her, but she'd laughed at the suggestion. It was strange to be walking with her in a house full of loaded energy, drink clouding his mind, but to not want her, not feel the friction between them.  
  
"What have you been up to lately?" Keran asked when they reached the kitchen. He grabbed a beer from the tub of ice water that they were left in and opened it, leaning back against the counter. Senestra raised an eyebrow at him, then fished out her own drink.  
  
"Not much. Been working down on the docks. I saw your mom a few weeks back, she said you were still in school."  
  
"I am." Keran said, not offering more.  
  
They drank in silence for a while, a few people coming by and saying hello to either one or both of them. When Keran sat down his beer, Senestra stood on her tiptoes and kissed him, her beer still in one hand. There was nothing technically wrong with the kiss, but Keran didn't really want it, didn't want her anymore, and he pushed her gently away with open palms, shaking his head.   
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
Senestra laughed, a bitter, hard sound tinged with regret. "Don't be. I've already had you." She said, and scooted out of the kitchen, disappearing amongst the people milling about. Whether or not he'd actually hurt Senestra's feelings, he didn't know, but they'd hurt each other enough over the years. Suddenly, the party lost its appeal to him, and he wanted to be someplace, any place else.   
  
The faces were too familiar, there was too many memories without the hope of anything ever being forgotten. Nothing really new, him and Senestra, Cook and his music schemes, faces from school he could never escape, everything was old and comfortable, even if it wasn't particularly pleasant. It occurred to him how much of an anomaly he was amongst this group, going to school and wanting something more. He picked up his beer again and drank it, wondering about Bethany Hawke and what she was doing tonight.


	5. Dinner in Hightown

It was already late in the evening when Bethany came home from work, and her mother had been holding dinner off until she arrived.  It was formal in a way that would usually enchant Bethany, reminding her of the times when her line came from the nobility of Kirkwall, but in this case it irked her, made her feel as though she were lax and late to the feast.  Her irritability came primarily from work, but was compounded by the start of another weekend without the promise of any social activities on the horizon.

"Oh Beth, you're finally home  We've been waiting for you."  Leandra said.

"You didn't have to do that, Mother.  I can always eat later."  Bethany was taking off the heeled sandals she'd stupidly worn without breaking in.  Her sister, Nori, had bought them for her during her last visit to Tantervale, but Beth hadn't a chance to wear them until she started working.  She was regretting it, the high, summery shoes looked pretty, but she'd teetered about in them as if she'd never worn heels before.  Nori was always wearing shoes like this, and Beth had to admire her, because she'd trade them for a pair of loafers any day.

"Don't be silly, Beth.  We'll always wait for you."  Leandra said in a soft voice.  Her mother shook her head and was heading back towards the dining room, calling out for Bethany to join them when she was ready. 

Instead of following her mother, she walked up the stairs and headed towards her room, closing the door and sinking down onto the yellow flowered counterpane.  She slid out of the dressy clothes she wore to work, carefully folding them and hanging the over the back of an overstuffed white armchair.  Even her own room didn't seem to fit her anymore, the cheery yellow checked counterpane on the bed she'd so loved when she bought it, or the white walls with their carefully arranged pictures in black wooden frames seemed to belong to a different person.  

In this regard she envied Carver, who had never gone away from home for longer than a summer, and his room, even with Merrill and her plants living in it with him, still felt like him.  Bethany wasn't sure who she was anymore, standing in the middle of a bright room that bore signs of a happier, younger person.  Even her clothes reflected more of her past than her present, and she thumbed through her selection of cotton dresses, tennis skirts and riding pants, before settling on a dress made of a slubby, grey knit, slouchy but breezy and comfortable.  

   
A photo on the wall caught her eye as she was leaving, a group photo of her and her tennis team from high school.  At the time, those girls had been her world, just as Carver's lacrosse team had become his brothers.  Now, she hardly knew any of them, and with the exception of Ella and their coach Mharen, she had lost touch with her old team.  That was how everything in her life felt, she could remember it being different, but didn't know how to get back there.  She sighed, and left the room, wishing she could close the door on her thoughts as she had to her bedroom.  

At least she knew what to expect from her family, and Beth smiled as she went down to the dining room where their mother insisted they all eat dinner together.  It was a formal room, made informal by their constant use of it.  In a corner, stacks of paper that Leandra had been pouring over for her charity work sat, hastily moved from the table, and Carver always drawing his comics and heroes, had simply pushed aside his sketchbook and graphite pencils, intending to take them up later in the night.  The piece that extended the table had been removed and though it could fit eight, there was only seats for six at the moment.  Caver and Merrill were already eating, the two of them sitting next to each other on the same side of the table.  Bethany took her seat at her mother's right, glancing over at the empty seat at the other end of the oblong table, the one that first their father, and now her sister Nori occupied whenever she came home.

Leandra must have noticed her gaze, and as Bethany made a plate for herself in the kitchen, her mother began talking about their older sister.

Nori was moving back to Kirkwall, and no one was more excited than Beth.  She loved and admired her sister, though she worried about her, how distant she'd become since their father died.  Nori was prone to fits of solitude, not speaking to anyone until she'd worked out her problems for herself.  After their father died, the phone calls from her grew less frequent, and she'd thrown herself into her work to get past it.  It had been years, but Bethany thought her sister was coming around, this move back home signaling a desire to be closer to family.

"I can't believe your sister is finally moving back to Kirkwall.  It will be good to have the whole family here again."  Leandra said.

"She's not moving in, Mother."  Carver pointed out.  "More like having the whole family across town."

"You know what I mean, darling.  In Kirkwall.  Where we belong.  With Beth here, both of my girls will be around, and I'll have to start looking into finding dates for the two of you.  It does you no good to be in on a night like this."  Leandra chided in a voice more concerned than upset.

Bethany blanched, not liking that idea one bit.  The last time her mother had 'found' a date for her, Bethany hadn't spoken to her for a week afterwards.  Granted, that was in high school, but the memory still lingered.  "I don't think that will be necessary."

"Why not?"  Carver asked, perking up.  "Don't tell me you've got a boyfriend stashed under your bed."  He teased.

"Not me, but I don't doubt Nori will be dating before Mother could even arrange a date for her."  Beth said, deflecting the gentle prod with a blush.

"That's true."  Leandra concurred, her eyes crinkling with a smile as she reminisced.  "Your father was always chasing boys away from her.  I hoped that with that doctor fellow, Anders, she'd grown more serious, but it doesn't seem that way since they've split."

"What's your sister like?"  Merrill asked.  "I've only met her a few times, and never for very long.  Will she like me?"

"Oh, I'm sure she already does, Merrill."  Beth said soothingly, but Carver scowled.

"Nori's like father, only younger, female and without the law degree.  But she went into politics because of him, and wrote his biography."  He said.

"That's not true."  Leandra sighed, trying to diffuse the tension before Carver could ramp himself up.  "She only wrote the foreword.  While she'd a great deal like Malcolm, she's her own person, Carver, as are you."

For once, he nodded, giving in without a fight.  Bethany supposed he was saving the real fights for Nori herself, he loved playing upon the differences in their somewhat strained relationship.  Deep down, there was nothing but love between them, but Carver still had trouble letting his childhood rivalry with her go.

Bethany was silent for most of the rest of the meal, and excused herself before anyone else had left.  She thought about what her mother said about dating, and immediately her mind went to Keran.  It was strange to keep seeing him, but she liked him, liked bumping into him.  He wasn't someone she'd ever normally meet, no doubt he lived somewhere away from Hightown and hadn't gone to her private high school.  He and his sister seemed a good sort, and she had to admit, she admired his lean body as he'd biked away, watching him until he'd become a speck in the distance.

Maker, she'd love a date with Keran, and wondered what he was doing that night.  She knew next to nothing about him, other than that his sister was a pregnant seating hostess.  Too many questions that she couldn't fathom answers to shut her mind down, and she found herself simply thinking of his face, the way he'd smiled at her before, the last time she'd seen him.   

A knock on her door interrupted her thoughts.  "Come in."  Bethany said, sitting up on her bed.

"Hey."  Carver entered with a pile of laundry.  "Folded your clothes for you."  He said.

"Thanks.  Couldn't sleep?"  She guessed.  He didn't usually fold her laundry, but he hated being idle if something was on his mind.

"Got blocked, so I needed a distraction, something to take my mind off the drawings."  He explained.  Beth smiled at that, remembering how many times she'd come in to see him working at the table with his headphones on, drawing away.  It must be so frustrating to have a creative block that could only be worked out with time. 

"Hey, are you alright, sis?"  Putting the clothes down on her armchair, he sat down on the foot of her bed.

"I don't know, Carver.  Work is just, a lot.  There's so much to learn, and they all just know it.  It's wearing me out.  And after work, what else is there for me to do?  Ella is about the only person that I was close with that's still around Kirkwall, and I hardly ever see her."

"It's gonna get better.  You've only been home a few months."  Carver pointed out.  "You aren't like your old friends, anyway.  It won't be easy, but you'll meet new ones, people more like who you've grown to be."  His sage words were meant to comfort, but Beth wondered if she'd grown at all since she'd left school.  That life felt as if it belonged to another person, as if she had to cross an ocean of time to even recall it. 

He was about to say more, but closed his mouth, silence falling between the two twins.  Before either of them could break it, Merrill popped her braided head into the room, carrying a board game.

"I thought you might want to play.  Leandra went out, so we can stay up here."  Merrill said, looking from Beth to Carver as she spoke.

Carver smiled at Merrill, a grateful, honest look of affection, and Beth wondered when she'd find something similar, someone as compatible with her as Merrill was to Carver.  

"I'd love to play."  Beth said, sliding to the end of her bed, next to Carver.  "Let's sit on the floor."

Summoning up her enthusiasm, she set up the game, thinking of the many times she'd played it in the past.  It wasn't her idea of a perfect Friday night, but when she needed comfort and company the most, her family was there, and she was grateful.


	6. B Leather

Work wasn't the refuge she often made it out to be, though she suspected her mother knew it. When Beth wasn't working, she often thought longingly of the distraction that being busy provided, and how much she enjoyed her field. When she was at work, she got the littlest jobs, often not more than interior decorating and shadowing the others. It was true, she was just out of school, and tried to accept it with grace, knowing she would have to work her way up, but in practice, it annoyed her to no end.

Her day started with a call, the kind of call she dreaded, a demanding voice looking for answers about something she only knew in passing.

"Hello, is this that new interior design girl?" The male voice on the other end of the phone asked, as if she just hadn't said her name. Strictly speaking, she was an associate architect, not an interior designer, but she let the slight pass without comment.

"This is Beth." She repeated, just as she had when she picked up the phone.

"It's John from the waterfront dentist office project." She barely understood his speech, he was in a rush to get to the point of his call. "I have a problem."

"What can I help you with?"

"This invoice is for black leather couches, but the client wanted brown. Did you order these?"

"I'm pretty sure I didn't order anything for that, but I can look it up if you give me the invoice numbers and the plan reference."

"I don't have them. Aren't you sitting in front of a computer? You can look them up."

"That's going to take me a while."

"Call me back." He said, hanging up before she could tell him that she didn't actually have his number or really know who he was.

It took her a while to track down what he wanted, and even longer to find someone that actually had a number to call him back. The office staff seemed just as confused as she did when she asked about the couches. When she found the offending invoice, it confusingly listed the couches as "B leather" explaining nothing further to her. B could have been blue, black, brown, bronze or anything that started with the letter 'B' for all she knew.

As she was trying to find a receipt, email, something to clarify what was ordered, the mysterious John called her back.

"Beth-Amy, this is John. Were you planning on calling me back today? The client is not happy."

"It's just Beth. I was tracking down the invoices you asked for. It just listed it as "B Leather" so I wanted to find some other confirmation."

"B Leather? What is that supposed to mean? Aren't you in charge of this sort of thing? That's what you interns are for."

She blew out a breath between her teeth, trying not to let her annoyance break through her veneer of professionalism. "Sir, I'm not an intern." She started to explain.

"That makes it even more appalling then. You know, these people can go anywhere, to any firm, and try to keep in mind that they pay your salary. Just get it right and call me back. This is your fault if these clients aren't happy." He said before hanging up on her again.

She looked at the phone, unable to understand what had happened. The conversation had deteriorated, and she'd barely said a word. Tears stung her eyes and she promised herself she wouldn't cry in the office or run away to the ladies room. With an effort, she bit back the hot tears that threatened to spill down her face at work, in front of everyone. None of her colleagues were even looking at her, working around her as if they hadn't been listening in on her conversation, and she couldn't understand their indifference. Even as a child, she'd hated to hear people get in trouble, and went to dire lengths to avoid it herself. It was she who covered up for Carver and Nori when they needed it, knowing that Beth couldn't stand to disappoint anyone.

She went back to her research, though she wasn't sure quite who had handled this order or where the paperwork went. That, she thought savagely, was the problem with interns and temp staff. They did well enough but weren't there to answer follow up questions, and then she got berated for it. Encounters with people of all kinds were part of the job, even difficult or hard to please clients, but still, she hated to have anyone yelling at her for anything. It wasn't in her nature to take it letting someone down easily, and once the indignation finally subsided, she felt small.

Her mind was consumed throughout the rest of the day, vacillating between teary frustration and anger. Despite the mix up, he decided to see if the client wanted to keep the couches as is or send them back. Beth was knee deep in conflicting paperwork, cancelled, backordered and reordered items, but was sure of one thing. The date of the order in question was a week before she had been hired, so it couldn't possibly have been her mistake. Still, something in her made her unable to call him back and point out the fact that he was blaming the wrong person, and she doubted he would have cared.

It was the lowest she'd felt since moving home. There was no one for her to explain it to at work, no one to listen and stand up for her, and certainly outside of work, no one to tell. She needed a friend, an arm, something, so leaving work she tried to call her sister, but just got Nori's voicemail instead. Beth clicked off without leaving a message, the ravages of the day making her shoulders slump as if a real weight had been laid across their breadth.

Though it wasn't on her way home, she stopped at the Chantry, unsure of where else to go, but not wanting to go home or return to work. It was odd how foreign the place felt to her now, though her feet led her there as if they knew the path better than her mind. She used to love going with her mother when she was younger, but grew out of the habit of religious contemplation. All throughout her childhood, she used to attend services, even after Nori and Carver stopped going, and she found solace in it when her father fell ill.

"Be welcome, child." A Mother said to her in greeting as she entered the building. The sounds of a chanter, up in the pulpit reciting their daily portion of the Chant of Light floated down to her. Once inside, the soothing atmosphere took effect immediately, and she breathed in deeply, inhaling the scent of incense and candle wax. The familiar red candles were lending their glow as they spread out beneath the statuary in the sanctum, illuminating the intimidating likeness of the Maker and his Bride from their feet on up. Oh, how she had loved it here as a child, even when she hadn't understood all that was going on.

There was a gentle swish of robes as the newest initiates of the Faith exited a door off the main chamber, their duties in the hall done for the day. With curious eyes, Beth watched them leave, wondering what it must be like to live in the austerity of the Chantry. She couldn't imagine it, but realized that it must bring great peace to those that chose their calling. Peace, she could do with a great deal more of that in her life these days. Without the others in the hall, she was more aware of the activity around her, the people coming and going through the large doors, the group of children in a meeting room not far from her. Bending her head, she closed her eyes and tried to shake off her distressing day the soothing monotone of the chanter filling her ears.


	7. A Shift

Whatever she was expecting from her meditations, it wasn't what happened that night.  
  
Deep beneath Kirkwall, there were old caverns that had long since been abandoned and forgotten by most of the city above them. There were crumbling, ancient mineshafts, tunnels and even roads down there, holds used by the slavers back when the city had been a port of call for the Tevinter Imperium. People had lived under there, hiding, eking out an existence, and perhaps some still did. All of that malevolent history unnerved Beth, and for the most part, she ignored the city of filth under her feet, as did most of the residents of Kirkwall.  
  
During his tenure in the Assembly, her father had tried to get them filled in with concrete or at least some sort of dirt, citing how unstable they made the growing city. Time and time again the efforts were shot down for various reasons, most of them due to cost. The taxpayers voted down a levy to raise funds for it, and private construction companies only did what was required for their building projects.  
  
Once, when they were much younger, Carver had gone down into the tunnels on a dare. He was always so headstrong and eager to prove he wasn't afraid, but after his underground sojourn, he lost some of his bravado. Whatever he'd encountered had rattled him, even if it was nothing more than rats and shadows. Their parents had grounded him for a week afterwards, and he never spoke of what he saw down there, shivering and shaking his head whenever she asked.   
  
That night, she felt a rumbling shift beneath her as she sat in the Chantry. What she could have passed off as a truck passing by outside continued, growing into a tremor that rocked the braziers and threatened to blow out the eternal flames. Bethany knew it for what it was when she was shunted side to side, helpless as around her the ground rolled like waves. Seismic events weren't new to the city, especially with the empty tunnels beneath them, but she'd rarely felt one so powerful. Books jumped from shelves, and she immediately jumped up, worried that the candles or fire would spread without warning.  
  
Adrenaline raced through her veins, filling her with purpose. She could help, follow directions, do what was needed. There would be people coming here to seek sanctuary from the street, panicking. Were there children in the Chantry? Could those vacant tunnels run under the very large and old Chantry building where she sat? Her frantic mind leapt to and fro, wondering at the possibilities, but she willed herself to stay calm.  
  
"I'm gettin out of here!" A man cried out to no one in particular and seconds later she saw the owner of the voice, a man in a suit running pell-mell towards the golden double doors.  
  
Screaming started after the first wave, the sound muffled coming from behind doors, and Beth looked around, startled. The other people in the pews, a scant few, were wearing looks of confusion and fear that mirrored her own, even as the earth trembled beneath them once again.  
  
"Help, someone help put out the flames!" A voice, high-pitched with fear called out around them. The Chantry was always full of the symbolic red candles that burned, blazing bright in memory and offering. Near the pulpit, a Mother was standing with a fire extinguisher, dousing the candles that had toppled over.  
  
Disregarding her own horrible day at work, Bethany made her way down to the first floor, the voice calling for help springing her into action. Before she could even get there, all the candles had been extinguished, the loss of the dim light plunging the Chantry into near darkness. She fought to keep her own rising terror in check, knowing that the worst had already passed.  
  
"Everyone keep calm!" Her voice rang with a note of authority she hadn't known she possessed, and people actually turned to look at her. With an effort, Bethany made her movements deliberate and precise, controlled but still moving quickly.  
  
She made her way over to the woman that had called for help, whom still was visibly frightened, so Bethany gently guided her. "Go and help at the doors, and keep yourself calm. People are looking to you." She reminded the woman in the Chantry robes.  
  
With a nod of understanding, the woman tripped dazedly towards the doors, where a lone Brother was trying to keep the mass of people clustering there from causing injury as they pushed their way in or out of the building.  
  
For the most part, the rocking had already subsided, with a few, less violent aftershocks, still shaking the people assembled. Though the quake had been brief, Bethany guessed it to be less than a minute total, save for the aftershocks, people were confused and worried. Their fright had to be quelled before it descended into hysteria.  
  
Drawing in a deep breath, Bethany began going around to people, checking for injuries. With her soothing presence assisting, it took only a short time for the Chantry to get back up and running, and by the time she was done making her circuit, more candles had been lit, filling the Chantry with the familiar flickering light once again. It was a comfort to her be near something approximating normalcy. Every time the door opened, she could hear the raised voices and feel the tension of the people outside, but inside remained peaceful, people helping each other and the priests once they'd regained themselves.  
  
She needed that peace more than she could even say that night, even if she did have to help create it.  
  
######  
  
"Thank you, my child." Yet another voice said to her as she made her way out of the Chantry. It was for the most part, unharmed, as were the people in it. She was simply glad she had been of help instead of adding to the panic.  
  
The Revered Mother had thanked her personally for all her help, clasping her wrinkled hands around Beth's as she did. Her touch was familiar and strange at the same time, but it added something, a feeling of need and peace that had been absent ever since she'd graduated. Without further need of her, Beth headed home, on the phone with her mother once she had a chance to speak with her again. Around her, the city was still filled with the frenetic energy that succeeds strange events, more people outside than in, shaken and talking with their neighbors, the police force out in full display.   
  
As far as she could see, there was very little damage that would last. Though she wasn't close to the epicenter, and knew that there would be more destruction there. Fortunately, her home was further away from the center, and from Leandra's assurances, there was no damage and simply just a mess of books, a few shattered glasses and Merrill's plants to clean up.  
  
In the morning, she woke up with an odd feeling. Looking at her clock, she saw it was an hour before her alarm. Nothing felt the way it had the previous morning, not after last night. She wouldn't go so far as to say she almost died, no, her life had never really been in danger yesterday, but Beth felt like the earthquake had worked to put things back in order in her mind.  
  
Her life was her own, and she'd helped people yesterday. It was more than endless bitching and meaningless tasks at work, or coming home to nothing and not really knowing what she wanted. This was her life, and she had to change it if she ever wanted to shake this feeling. Yesterday had reminded her of what it was like to feel needed, to be part of it all instead of just a spectator.   
  
There was something else that was gone, the dreadful feeling of uncertainty had been lifted from her. For so long, Beth simply had felt compelled to do what she thought was correct, without questioning it. She hadn't thought of what she truly wanted, or what appealed to her. In the morning light, she sat against her headboard, enjoying the inner calm that had so long been absent from her life.  
  
Head held high, she strode into work, past her milling coworkers with a curt nod, whom were all buzzing with tales of the quake. There would be time later to talk, she was sure of it, keeping her focus on her task. Beth picked up the phone to call John back and point out his mistakes, and that they were not her fault nor her concern, since she had her own work to contend with, and it was plenty without his problems. She was an associate architect, and it was well past time she demanded the respect she deserved. Getting a degree might not have been field experience, but damn it, it was work.  
  
In all the time that she'd been home, she'd suffered, feeling battered and broken, grateful for anything approximating a life. She'd thought, sadly, that she could fit back in where she left, seeing old friends and impressing them with her new knowledge. Time wasn't static and the years that had passed for her in college had also passed for the people in Kirkwall. Discovering that made her out of sorts, and confused her more than a little - her memory still saw things, people in Kirkwall the same, why didn't other people?  
  
Now she understood a little better, the shock of the night before jolting her. Her life was now, not in her memories, and if she wanted to feel more connected to Kirkwall of now, she'd better start making connections herself. No magic friend from the past was going to do it for her.  
  
After she hung up on John, explaining in no uncertain terms, she was not at all responsible for the 'B Leather' chairs, and that he should learn to be more convincing and get the client to like them, Bethany stood and stretched. There was a jaunt in her step as she walked away to make a cup of tea, casually stopping by the front desk on her way back to chat. Talk of the night before still continued, and she found a rapt audience for her tale.  
  
"Mary, could you do me a favor?" Bethany leaned over to talk to the elderly receptionist before going back to her cubicle. She had to find her own way.  
  
She may have asked the receptionist to keep an eye out for Keran, the delivery boy that she found out, was considered to be quite handsome by most of the women in the front office. It was her luck that the bulk of them were married or older than her mother. She may have also asked to be messaged if he came into the office. A few days after those events allegedly happened, an instant message popped up on her computer screen alerting her that Keran was there. Running her hands through her hair, Beth hurried to the front office, and got there just in time to see him handing over his clipboard for a signature.  
  
Walking quickly, she went through the inner door that led to the office and into the vestibule. He hadn't noticed her yet, and she was standing, nervously waiting in silence.   
  
"Keran." She said, drawing his attention over to her.  
  
He looked up, face splitting into a huge grin when he saw her. "Bethany. I hoped I'd see you."  
  
"Do you want to go out for dinner or drinks with me?" Bethany asked, the words tumbling from her mouth before she lost her nerve.  
  
"Absolutely. I'd like nothing better." He said, taking his phone from a padded case he wore on his hip. "Give me your number." She did, and he called her immediately, but her phone was on her desk. He left a message, looking at her while he did. "Bethany, I'd really love to have dinner, drinks, or go dancing with you at your earliest convenience. Possibly some combination of all three, if you'd like." He said into the phone, making her giggle. He ended by leaving his number, making sure she had it.  
  
"I'd love to go." Beth said to him.  
  
"Nope, you don't get off that easily. You'll have to call me back when your whole office isn't watching." He said in a conspiratorial voice, and she glanced over her shoulder, and saw that he was correct. Everyone was watching them covertly, conversations had halted, and they feigned doing work when she peeked over at them.  
  
Despite their audience, she was giddy, and nervous giggles kept pouring out of her. "Alright. I'll call you later then. For our date."  
  
"It's a date to set up a date then." He said, grinning back at her. "I've got to get going, but I'm going to be around the corner for a few minutes, you know, checking the air in my tires, and making sure I haven't missed any phone calls."  
  
She practically floated back to her desk, and picked up her phone. Ringing back the last number that called her, Keran picked up on the first ring. She could hear him smile as he greeted her, and thought for the first time since she'd come back to Kirkwall, that things were more right than wrong.


	8. Dinner and Dancing

It wasn't that she didn't like wearing pants, Bethany quite often wore trousers to work, but only the ones she really liked, the pleated wide leg white ones in the summer, houndstooth cigarette pants when the weather turned colder. She had a full compliment of black dress trousers of varying styles, but she preferred her skirts and dresses. There might have been a pair of jeans in there, maybe one or two? She didn't really wear them, usually opting for riding pants instead when she wanted to feel casual. Looking at her closet, she didn't have anything suitable for a date. Her date, with Keran, that very night, which had her rushing home from work to get ready.  
  
She stood in her damask robe, surveying all of her options. Nothing in there said 'date', at least not in the way she was thinking of a date. Mentally, she berated herself for not shopping, or at least planning an outfit before that very night. Finally, at the back of her closet, still wearing the tags, she found a dress. Not just any dress, a strapless, cute little dress, white with giant red flowers printed on it. It was summery and casual, but not too informal for their dinner. It would need something underneath - her chest was too ample to allow forgoing some kind of bra or corset, but it would be perfect. Pairing it with red lipstick and dark, sultry eye makeup, once she'd finished her hair, Bethany was surprised at the face she saw in the mirror.  
  
The woman looking back at her was sexy and confident, her bare, tawny shoulders lending her a hint of skin without making her feel exposed.   
  
"I like your hair that way." Merrill's voice came from the doorway, and Beth turned, smiling at the other woman.  
  
Normally, she might ask if she was certain that it looked alright, or play with it, making sure it was to her liking. Instead, she checked her reflection once again, looking at her hair without making an attempt to fuss with it. It was straight, her chin-length hair was too short to do much but lie there, short and straight, but she'd pinned her fringe back and let the sides frame her face. The effect was startling, putting her big eyes and red lips on display.  
  
"Thank you." Bethany said to Merrill, who was still openly admiring her.  
  
"You should go on dates more often. You look great!" Merrill said, delivering the compliment in her usual, earnest way, without a trace of artifice.  
  
"I'll say." Carver's somewhat dismayed voice echoed Merrill's sentiment, making Bethany laugh. If her brother was complimenting her, she must look good. "He better be worth your time." He growled, watching her as she put on a necklace before turning away from the mirror.  
  
"I think he is." Beth answered. Carver was protective of her, though they had something of an understanding between them. If it was personal and private, they could talk, but neither one of them pushed. It served them well over the years, with him calling her to ask advice about Merrill while Bethany was away at school.   
  
"Alright then. I'll tell Mother..." He waited, wanting her to fill in what time she planned on coming home.  
  
"Late probably." Bethany finished. He scowled a little, but nodded. She waved at them as she walked away from the door, sure that Carver would keep his phone on, if not wait for her. Whether she agreed with it or not, he saw himself as the man of the house without their father around. It gave her a strange comfort to know he cared, but was making an effort not to butt in or be pushy. She walked the few blocks to the restaurant, the thought fading from her mind as she drew closer, ready to see Keran again.  
  
#####  
  
Keran wanted to make everything perfect for their date, though he knew the futility of the effort. The anticipation of actually seeing Bethany outside of a casual run-in made him overly fastidious with his appearance. Dating was always strange territory for him, with scarcely any experience in going on such formal dates. He wondered what people did on dates besides go to eat, or for coffee. How many meals constituted a relationship? Was there a number, or was he just supposed to guess?   
  
He was nervous about the date itself, not about meeting Bethany. Little things started to worry him, like what to do with his hands while they were waiting or if he should style his hair, make it look different, like he'd made an effort to look nicer than usual. In the end, he simply got dressed and left the house, heading out before any ideas could overtake his common sense and spur him to regrettable action.  
  
Waiting outside for Bethany after he parked his car in a lot not too far away, Keran looked towards the lights of the residential part of Hightown. It seemed like a different world to him, not just in address, but status and lifestyle.   
  
It hadn't occurred to him before that Bethany belonged in Hightown, and he didn't, not until he'd been talking to his sister. Macha was nearly past her due date, and spent her days resting, her maternity leave from work already started. It was she that had asked about Beth's last name, remembering the politician named Malcolm Hawke, who died a few years before. A quick search on Keran's phone had revealed him as her father, and he found out she had a sister in politics too, named Norina. She was as like Bethany in looks as not, pretty and dark-haired, sharing the same fallow shade of skin, but favored longer hair and glasses. The woman in the portrait he saw on a government website from Tantervale was beautiful, but clearly more worldly than Bethany, her eyes holding a wealth of knowledge that lacked her sister's innocent warmth. He would lay odds that she was witty, cynical and intimidatingly intelligent, and wondered if he'd ever get close enough to Bethany to meet her.  
  
"Hello there." Bethany had come up without him noticing, and he started at the sound of her voice, though she'd spoken softly.  
  
"Beth." Keran looked at her, taking in her dress and makeup. "Oh, wow. You look...really amazing."  
  
"Thank you." She gave a large smile at his words, her shoulders softening as some of her nervousness ebbed away. With nothing much more to say for the moment, she motioned towards the door. "Shall we go in?"  
  
Keran nodded, not trusting his voice. He suddenly felt underdressed, though he was entirely appropriate for their date. He so wanted to make a good impression, but he didn't feel at all himself. He envied her ease, the confidence that allowed her to look as if she belonged no place but in a posh restaurant on a Friday night. As they were walking in a short, stocky blond man, his shirt unbuttoned to reveal a wide swath of muscular, hairy chest, held the door for them.  
  
"Varric Tethras!" Beth sang out the name, earning a smile from the man. He glanced over, not recognizing her at first, but then let out a low wolf-whistle.  
  
"Lady Sunshine, it's been too long! I hardly recognized you."  
  
"Varric, this is Keran. Keran, this is Varric Tethras, a who tells the tallest tales, knows everyone that's anyone and is a friend of the family."  
  
"Nice to meet you, messere." Varric said graciously, extending a hand for Keran to shake.   
  
"You as well." Keran replied. Tethras, he knew that name too, another influential family in the Free Marches. Bethany must know or be related to most of the power in the city he realized.  
  
"Speaking of your family, I talked to your sister recently. She's moving back?" Varric asked, though he knew the answer already.  
  
"Yes! Soon, I think. But you'll be working with her, won't you? You probably know more than I do. I've been...busy."   
  
Varric looked from her to Keran and chuckled knowingly. "So I see. I've got to get going, but I suspect we'll see each other again soon. Enjoy your dinner, Keran, Bethany." He said, nodding a goodbye at each of them in turn.  
  
Bumping into Varric had Bethany talking again, about people he knew only by reading about their names in the paper or seeing them on the news. Keran struggled to keep up with her explanations and descriptions of people. Her sister was apparently moving home to Kirkwall to work in the Viscount's office soon, and her brother - Bethany's twin, was none too happy. Keran nodded along, glad that he wasn't expected to remember all these names and people quite yet.  
  
Once inside, they got a table quickly, and Bethany kept up a steady stream of babble as they looked at their menus. It was good so far, the two of them relaxing and beginning to laugh together, their shared tension eventually easing away. Tired of talking of her family, she switched topics to tell him about her job, giggling as she talked about how anticipated their date was. The entire front office thought he was cute, and were expecting details of their date once the work week began again.  
  
He told her about his studies and work, enthusiastically talking about his impending graduation in the next year. It was hard-earned, and he would be glad to leave school behind, though he was considering a graduate degree once he had more experience. Keran was unusually open with her, and talked about wanting to get out of his mother's house, to let his sister's family have his space, once he'd saved up enough. Beth completely understood, though she hadn't formulated her own plans to move, she often thought of it.  
  
"Do you like your job?" He asked.  
  
"Sometimes. I'm still learning, but it can be difficult. I sometimes feel like I can't catch up to the wealth of knowledge just stored inside peoples heads. It can be intimidating and frustrating at times." She admitted.  
  
"You can always call me if you want to escape." He offered.  
  
"Escape? It's like a get out of work free call?" Bethany giggled at him and he shook his head.  
  
"More like a take a break from mundane reality call. At least for a little while."  
  
"Mundane reality? Isn't that to your liking? I thought you were an economist; aren't you all supposed to be boring as dry toast?"  
  
He feigned offense at her words, knowing full well that they described most of the professors he'd had in the subject. "My lady, I hardly think that's fair. Aren't all architects in movies men who design houses for quirky yet lovable heroines?"  
  
"True." She conceded with a laugh.   
  
They talked easily throughout their dinner, the two of them swapping stories about growing up in Kirkwall and going to school. It seemed so odd to Bethany that they'd never met before, but the city was larger than it seemed, and she'd gone to private schools her whole life, not the public ones he'd attended.  
  
His car was parked nearby, but neither of them felt like parting, so they went by it, walking slowly, still continuing their conversation. She held his hand after dinner, when they meandered through Hightown. They wound up, somehow, in between there and the Waterfront district, a redone part of town near the Docks. It was a part of town Bethany knew existed, but had never really visited.  
  
"Do you wanna dance?" Keran asked her as they walked down the street.  
  
"What? Here?"  
  
He smiled, tilting his head towards an innocuous looking building. "No. There. It's a place I used to go to, but it might be a little grittier than you're used to."  
  
"Let's go." She said, answering the unspoken challenge in his words. There was something about the juxtaposition that appealed to him, a born and bred Hightown girl like Bethany, fresh from a private college, bumping and grinding in the dark with people who'd never left Kirkwall in their entire lives.


	9. Alone Together

Bethany was a surprisingly good dancer, not needing the sweet drink she ordered to lower her inhibitions. He was glad of that, that she didn't get drunk, but wanted to dance, switching to water after one drink, to keep herself cool she claimed. His hands slid over her as they danced, smoothing over her hips as she ground her backside into his pelvis, skimming over her shoulders as she pulled him closer for a slower tempo song. She laughed as she bobbed along to the throbbing bass of the music surrounding them, keeping at least an arm, sometimes more, around Keran to prevent people from getting between them as they danced. He hadn't expected her to be so much, so forward with him, but he liked her assertiveness, never guessing how newfound it was.  
  
They kissed there on the dancefloor, surrounded by a sweating mass of writhing people for their first kiss. Bethany brushed an errant lock of hair from her face, stuck by the beads of perspiration that made her shine in the florescent lighting. Her eyes had been dark pools, fathomless and deep when he'd looked down at her. It was her touch that brought them together, her arms wrapping around her, her upturned face seeking out his lips.  
  
When Senestra had kissed him, she'd tasted dark and lonely with the promise of trouble, like whiskey on a sultry summer night, humid and heavy, just before a storm. Bethany was crisp and sweet as white wine, like the gentle nip of autumn in the air, or the first flowers of spring. Her kiss projected her transitional stage, and he knew she'd soon find her footing, and blossom into her comfort zone. Keran wanted to be a part of that, preferring her earnest self-discovery to Senestra's brand of false self-assurance. She kissed him, his mouth yielding to hers, letting them both find their way together, and soon they did, heat smoldering between the two of them as their tongues touched.  
  
The crowd thinned around them, and she led him away, out of the club, her fingers laced through his. It was humid in there, and his shirt clung to him, the cool of the night air making sweat dry cold on his body as they walked back to his car. Keran was glad of the cool night, it might stop the pounding of his blood from their close dancing, would help chill his desire and take the edge off so he could kiss her goodnight like a civilized person, and not a ravenous hound.  
  
A strange sense of regret came over him as his car came into sight, and Keran found he was a little sad that the night was coming to an end. With his keys out, he made to open the door for her, but Bethany surprised him. She kissed him against the car, pressing her body against his, demanding. Keran thought that he'd drive her home, kiss her goodnight a few times and call her in a few days about another date. But Bethany, her kiss told him she had other plans, and he couldn't find any objection to them.  
  
"Is there someplace we can go? Alone, I mean. My mother will be home now, and my brother is probably waiting up." Beth explained in a whisper, her breath hot against his neck as she spoke.  
  
Keran laughed, and for the first time, he kissed her, a slow, teasing exploration. Hugging her close to him, he found he liked being sandwiched between the heat of her body with the cool of his car on his back.  
  
"Yeah, I know a place." He answered, laughing again. "Though I haven't been there in ages, and I don't know how alone it is."  
  
When they got in the car, he drove away, meandering from the city lights. They went up to a place away from the parking lot in Hightown, away from eyes that might see them. It felt like High School again, but then, it didn't.  
  
Bethany had never been here before, but she knew well enough where he was headed. It was simply called The Place when she was in high school, a name she heard in whispers and boasts from others. She'd listened blushingly to the tales of course, but had never braved it herself. How odd that she was coming here for the first time as an adult when everyone around them was almost certainly in high school.  
  
But she'd been a proper little thing in high school, all of her kisses chaste and friendly. It wasn't until college, newfound freedom and Nori's urging ring in her ears did she really start to experiment. Even then, it had taken her a long while to actually go all the way with a guy, and they'd been in a relationship.  
  
Keran felt different, familiar and yet enticing to her. She wanted him, and the wanting was the new, exciting part. When they'd kissed while dancing, arousal had bowled through her, her body responding immediately and in no uncertain terms, demanding more. In the backseat of the car, they resumed the wet kisses that left her dizzy and weak, craving more. The feeling his touch created in her was powerful and heady, almost like too much drink, the kind that would leave her doubled over and sputtering on the first sip. Instead of shying away, as she would have before, she embraced it, the recklessness, the need that clawed at her. She slid the front of her strapless dress down, revealing the breasts that had threatened to spill from it so many times while they'd danced.  
  
It took all of his effort not to immediately move to her chest, to suckle the large, heavy breasts he'd been admiring all night. The moonlight leached the color from her skin, making her look unnaturally pale despite her deep skin tone, her dark nipples standing out like shadows, already tight with arousal before he slid a hand down to tease them. Were they on a bed, he would kiss her properly and let his hands wander all over her bare skin, but they didn't have the luxury of space. He all but was kneeling on the tiny bit of floor in the backseat, his legs folded uncomfortably beneath him.  
  
Despite the confines of the backseat, Keran let her spread out as much as she could, the two of them in various states of undress. Her fingers had unbuttoned his shirt, tugging it from his waistband and sliding hands beneath it to caress the muscled, hard flesh underneath. His job demanded physical strength and speed, and several summers of deliveries had chiseled his body into something powerful and wiry, all angles and hard planes. His tongue and fingers explored her sticky sweet skin, kissing her neck and collarbone, moving lower until he finally got to taste the hardened crowns of her breasts.  
  
Moving with deliberate sloth, Keran flicked his tongue over and around a nipple, raking gentle teeth over it once he'd teased it enough. He did the same to the other nipple listening to Bethany whimper as he repeated the process. With every lick, he did away with the perfume she'd applied, the slightly bitter salty taste of her dried sweat from dancing, until he could simply taste her, her delicious skin warmed by his mouth.  
  
When she was reduced to nothing more than clutching at his head and moaning his name, he gave in. He pushed up her dress enough to get his hand under it, and kissing her, he slid fingers into her panties. The lace that covered her was already wet with her arousal, and had he enough space, he would have licked her through the cloth. She was warm, so warm and wet, gasping as he pushed a finger in. They'd been traipsing around her release all night, he could feel it thrumming within her as she danced along, could sense the need for it when she was prim and proper at dinner, and now it was so close to the surface, he felt it would be remiss to deny her. Keran let his thumb drift over her clit, already hard beneath the pad of his finger, engorged and hot.  
  
The confines of their space, while limiting, made things hotter in some ways. Wherever he moved, he could hear her breathing, feel her breasts heaving beneath him, their skin touching in so many places that he could hardly separate when he ended and she began. His fingers worked under her dress, inside her, as they kissed, panting and grunting, no more room to move more than they already were, no chance to retreat from the orgasm he could feel causing spasms around the fingers that were clenched so tightly by her cunt.  
  
When she came, it was with a long, protracted moan that curled his toes with its very pitch. It was a world apart from her normal, sweet voice - it was a deep, throaty moan that broke into a sob near the end. It spoke volumes about her need, and Keran found himself wishing he could give her more, another and another, until she could do nothing but sleep afterwards, her body sated and exhausted.  
  
Lazily, he dragged his fingers in and out of her tightness until the tremors that shook the backseat subsided. He withdrew his fingers after one final push inward, licking the taste of her from them as he sat back against the seat. She steadied herself, breathing deeply, before sitting up and facing him. If he'd thought her modest, she wasn't in that moment, not caring that her dress was still pulled down to expose her breasts as she kissed him again. Keran let his damp hands run over her shoulders, easing her away, he could take no more, his cock painfully hard.  
  
Intuiting the source of his resistance, her hands fumbled with his belt and zipper, eventually freeing him from the cloth confines of his pants. Bethany took him in hand, and Keran let his head fall back against the soft cushioning of the seat, his eyes closed. The first few strokes of her warm palm were blissfully overwhelming after such a buildup, and he groaned his inarticulate appreciation. Shivering as she sped up her stroke, he willed himself not to spill in her hand already, though he could have. When Beth bent her head and took him in her mouth, the shock of it nearly made Keran jump.  
  
She wasn't very experienced at it, he could tell, but eager, and he guided her head along, keeping pace for her. Maker, wasn't this supposed to be a first date? How had they wound up here, the two of them desperate and hungry, groping in the shadows?  
  
He came quickly, the combination of her hand, breath and lips too much after their night together working him to a fever pitch before she'd even unzipped his pants. Having her hot mouth around him was simply the icing on the cake. Fisting a hand in her short hair, they rocked back and forth, the marvelous, unyielding pressure of her mouth pushing him over. Her mouth still around him, she sucked down his seed as he came, hips jerking as he panted, grasping her head.  
  
When he regained some sense of himself, he knew it was time to go. They moved back up to the front seat, and Keran brought her to him for a kiss, much sweeter than any of the others that night.  
  
She wound her arms around him in a half embrace, and he could feel her heart beating rapidly through her dress. He half expected to look down and see her exposed again, but sadly, she'd fixed her dress and bra, and despite her smeared makeup and messy hair, she didn't look much different than when they'd finished dancing. They kissed a few more times, Bethany giggling. "Is it odd that I feel like we just got away with something illicit, like we're still in high school?" She asked.  
  
"I have that same feeling." He admitted, blushing in the darkened car as he started it up, then rolled down a fogged up window. Light from the headlamps flooded the area around them, and she saw that there were quite a few other vehicles parked near them. At least they had plenty of company in their clandestine activities.  
  
After that he did take her home, and kissed her goodnight on the doorstep, at a time that was hours past when he said he'd be home. There was less frustration in their parting than he'd initially pictured, but not less desire. If anything, he was overeager to her each other again, Keran unexpectedly even more entranced by her than before.


	10. Overthinking

In the next few days, Bethany lost some of the reckless bravado she'd adopted, struggling to find balance between it and her meeker, more restrained self. Though she didn't regret her actions at work, it awed her whenever she thought on the confrontation, and she was proud that she'd stood her ground. With Keran though, things were much less clear.  
  
The date had gone well by all regards, but Bethany still hadn't called Keran for another. She liked him, but worried about losing her heart already. Would things be alright between them after all but sleeping together already? Could she even have a relationship with him, or would it just be sex? Doubts plagued her, but she didn't have the heart to regret her actions. She liked Keran too much for that, but wondered exactly what he thought of her now. These thoughts seemed too heavy for someone she'd only been out with once, but she couldn't stop them.   
  
In her mind, she made a list of pros and cons, keeping a mental score as she thought of them. They texted each other, but he didn't call her right afterwards, which was a good thing in her estimation. Not clingy, but not distant. Her own mind was confused, and the doubts the night in the Chantry had pushed away made themselves known again. Inwardly, she chided herself for such recklessly wanton behavior, feeling exposed by her out of character actions. But that was the real problem, wasn't it? She didn't actually feel like she'd done anything wrong, but her whole life before was telling her that she had. Whenever she thought too much about it, her head grew heavy and confused, so she pushed it away to deal with later.  
  
"Didn't you have fun?" Leandra asked, gently querying about her date when she didn't talk about another on the horizon.  
  
"It was great. But, Mother, I wasn't like me. What if he doesn't actually like me?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
She shrugged, unsure of how to explain it. "I laughed a lot, and he made me open up. In retrospect though, the whole date was a little intense. It wasn't like anything I've ever felt before."  
  
"Amell women are headstrong in love. Listen to yourself and think about your date. He made you smile, I remember seeing you at breakfast the next morning, and you looked like a new person." The comment had been made then too, but Bethany hadn't recognized it for what it was for. "You might need what he brings out in you." Her mother pointed out.   
  
When Beth merely shook her head, still resistant, her mother tried again. "Maybe he's feeling the same way, but you won't know if you two don't try and settle it together. Sweetheart, he's a young man - if he likes you, he'll take his cues from you."  
  
Bethany said nothing, so Leandra went on. "Your father did some crazy things when we first met, and I think he did some of the wilder ones to impress me. And I wasn't myself either, we were both like two peacocks strutting for each other." She chuckled, remembering. "He was so much fun. It was at a party that I knew, I just knew that he was the one."  
  
Normally, Beth loved the stories of her parents, hearing about them in their younger days, but she was conflicted still. "Did it feel strange, like you weren't yourself?"  
  
"Of course some of it seems that way, looking back now. But at the time, we pushed each other, challenged one another. No one could make me laugh like your father, or could right my world like he did. He was dashing and funny, never dull, but dedicated to his studies."  
  
"Sounds like Keran." Bethany muttered without thinking.  
  
"Well then, darling, I think you do like him. Let go and just go on another date to see." Leandra advised.  
  
"Let go?" Bethany arched an eyebrow at her mother.  
  
Leandra shrugged in response. "You know yourself best. Just be careful."

#####  
  
Keran hadn't any spare time since their date, much to his chagrin. Macha had finally given birth, and he'd spent his off hours at the hospital until his sister came home, and then working around the house, running errands for their mother, who was busy seeing to his sister and the new baby boy. Classes were just about to start for him, and he'd gone to buy his books and materials after looking at the syllabi online.   
  
Though they exchanged the odd text message, he worried that he'd waited too long without talking to Bethany, unsure if she thought him disinterested. Life had gotten busy in a hurry, as it always seemed to with the restart of school, but Keran found himself missing her. It didn't help that he spent far more time than was wise thinking of her, realizing, belatedly that he was completely smitten with Beth - brazen yet sweet, beautiful and smart.  
  
His phone jangled with a text message, and he picked it up, half-hoping that his thoughts had made Bethany send him a message. It was from his mom. "Pick me up an onion if you go by the market on your way home."  
  
He opened the door. "Mom, I'm in the other room!" He shouted down the hall. Macha and Davey had taken their new son to visit his other grandmother for the afternoon, the house quiet and empty without the trio.  
  
"Sorry!" She yelled back from the kitchen. "I forgot you aren't working." He went into the kitchen and gave her a peck on the cheek. "It's been so hectic around here." She offered, but Keran didn't mind her forgetfulness.  
  
"I'll run to the store if you need it."  
  
She smiled at him and he nodded, grabbing his wallet and shoes. He was out the door, walking through the dusty, twilit streets, feeling more alone than usual.   
  
The trip was mercifully quick, there weren't many people out, and only got what his mother asked for, nothing else. Keran's phone rang as he was coming back home, and he answered thinking it was his mother wanting something else. He nearly turned on his heel as the call connected, expected to be headed right back into the store he'd just exited.  
  
"So, I thought that you and I could go for a picnic." Bethany's voice said to him. "Are you busy on Saturday?"  
  
"Not at all." Keran smiled at her faked tone of nonchalance, and played along.  
  
"Do you like picnics?" She asked.  
  
"Eating outside, on a blanket, racing the ants to the food. Without a doubt one of life's finest pleasures." He said, and was rewarded with her high, sweet giggle, a sound that eased some of the tension within him.  
  
"Good. I'll bring the food and everything else. You just meet me in Hightown square at noon." She said. "I'll be near the steps to the old Viscount's Keep."  
  
"Sounds good." Keran said, keeping his voice neutral. "I'm looking forward to it."  
  
"So am I." Bethany said, and hung up.  
  
He wanted to celebrate, to dance, to yell out across the whole of his neighborhood, but he settled for a little strut in his walk as he went home.


	11. A Second Date

It was the point where summer and autumn mesh, becoming one as they transition from heat to cool. The days grew shorter, the blazing heat of midday tempered by the nights that felt crisp with hints of fall. Keran put on a tshirt and cargo shorts, not sure where Beth's picnic would take place, but anywhere outdoors at noon would still be hot enough for shorts.  
  
This time he wasn't as concerned about his appearance, but rather, what would happen on their date. The pressure weighed on him; he wanted to connect with her, to make his feelings known and understand hers. Thoughts of Bethany invaded his mind so often now, he found himself daydreaming of nothing but hearing her whisper his name again. Her scent had lingered on his clothes for days afterward, reminding him of her, and their time cramped in the back of his car.  
  
When he got to Hightown, she was standing there, waiting, the handle of an oversized woven basket clasped in both hands. The sunlight made her dark hair shine, and she was wearing a blue dress, the color of sky and surf. It looked comfortable to his eyes, soft cotton, short sleeved and v-necked, with a sash tying it around her waist, accenting her curvy figure.  
  
Within a few minutes of her early arrival in Hightown's square she spotted Keran walking towards her. He was so broad, even in everyday clothes he rivaled the members of Carver's high school lacrosse team. But there was something distinctive about him, even at a distance she could recognize his gait and smiled in greeting as he approached her.  
  
"I'm sorry it's been so long." She apologized immediately. "I wanted to see you, but things got...busy." Bethany explained.  
  
He thought that 'busy' in this context meant she was confused, but then again, he wasn't sure, his life had certainly been eventful since their last date. "I'm glad you called." He said softly, and leaned in to kiss her cheek.  
  
At least, that was what he'd intended, but she met him with her lips, the soft brush of them against his own unleashing want throughout his body. The soft scent of her assailed him, perfume mixed with her skin, the combination brought memories of the back of his car to his mind. Neither of them extended the kiss, or deepened it, and he pulled away gratefully, it would have been quite the task to stop kissing her, once they'd truly started.  
  
"So," He began, exhaling a breath he hadn't realized he was holding, "where are we going?"  
  
"Do you like the beach? If not we can go someplace else."  
  
"Let's go." He said, and she took his hand, leading him away.  
  
Their trip to the beach was a day she wouldn't soon forget. Once they lost the awkwardness of that had grown between them since their last date, she remembered just how much she liked him, and of how easy it was to talk to him. The more they conversed, the lapsed time between them fell away, leaving ease and comfort in its wake.  
  
They sat on the warm sand, the blanket spread out beneath them. Around Kirkwall there was a large section of coast, and like the city, had its own checkered past. The bluffs and crags used to hide pirates and raiders regularly, though these days it was little more than a daytrippers retreat from the confines of city life.  
  
"I thought you might have given up on me to go after the guy with the chest hair we saw at the restaurant." Keran joked.  
  
"Varric? Ha, not likely! When I was younger, I did have such a crush on him, but he always..." Bethany blushed, then leaned in towards him. "I always thought he had a thing for my sister. They might have slept together a few times, she's never said."  
  
Though he'd never even met her sister, Keran somehow found this bit of gossip interesting. The eldest Hawke sibling seemed like quite the character, and though Bethany never vocalized her awe, he could hear it when she spoke of her sister. He just wanted to know all about Bethany, everything, about her family, her life, the things that had happened in her past, and what she wanted for the future. More than anything, Keran wanted to be a part of her future plans.  
  
Throughout their lunch, they talked, and eventually regained the ease they'd found with each other on their date. Keran spoke effusively about his nephew, and about the new classes he was enrolled in for the fall. All of her conversation focused on work, though she did talk about her sister after she'd been mentioned. In all things, their lives were well enough, plodding along their usual course.  
  
It was after the food was gone that Bethany laid down on blanket that held the heat from the warm sands and simply lay. She didn't pull Keran down to her, try to kiss him or anything like that. She was content but for one, looming issue, her eyes closed as she asked a quiet question.  
  
"Do you like me, or is this just sex?"  
  
"What do you mean?" Keran asked, taken aback by the question. He thought it was evident how much he liked Bethany.  
  
"Would you introduce me to your mom, or only want to be with me physically? I just want to know before I go and say or do something stupid."  
  
"What do you want?"  
  
Bethany shook her head, her eyes still closed. "Nope, I asked first."  
  
"Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed our time in the back of my car, but I'd like more than that, if you want to date. I'm already crazy about you."  
  
"And the other night, I didn't seem desperate, or scare you off?"  
  
"I'm here aren't I?" Keran asked, and she saw his shadow through her closed eyes and opened them to find him hovering above her. "So, do you want to date me, or just use me for my body? I prefer the dating, but I'm good with the using."  
  
Bethany laughed, and pulled him to her. "Dating, definitely." She answered, pulling him down towards her for a kiss.  
  
He lay down next to her after they broke apart, and held her hand. They were quiet for a while, the sound of their breathing, the occasional squawk of seagulls overhead. Keran liked the weight of her hand in his, her long, slender fingers entwined with his own. Sitting up on one arm, he reached over to give her another kiss. One gradually turned into many, and they were soon tangled together, breathless and wanting.  
  
The shifting afternoon sunlight dappled her skin, and even in the brightest spots she shone bronze under it. The thick, coal black hair that hit just below her jaw was mussed, her fringe swept away from her face by his hand, her lips slightly swollen from his fierce kisses. In his mind, it hardly stood to reason that she would want him, but before he could admire her more, she was kissing him again, and he drank her in.  
  
His hand was caressing her through the loose bodice of her dress, and her fingertips sneaked under his shirt, drawing lines across his chest. Just as it had on their first date, their attraction, their lust, took on a form of its own, goading them forward. Beth moaned as Keran pushed away the fabric that had blocked his access to her skin, and pressed his mouth to it, lips drifting over her collarbone and downward. He was lost to the thrill that called to his nature as he ventured downward, spurred on by inadvertent seduction of her blissful sighs.


	12. Hopeful

Keran raised an eyebrow as she loosened the sash of her dress, and let it slip down her shoulders, pooling at her waist. The unasked question hovered between them, and he caught himself holding his breath as he waited for her to speak. "This is what I want right now." She explained softly. "Do you?" He nodded in assent, and sat up, pulling his tshirt over his head.  
  
It took no time at all for them to be rid of their clothes, and he marveled at her, the lush tawny curves of her ripe body and flawless skin, absent of the scars and moles that dotted his own body. There was nothing in him that was as elegant as she, and he faltered, hesitating before her. Bethany eased his trepidation, clasping his hand in hers as they kissed. The gesture was so small, but important, though Keran couldn't readily identify why it was.  
  
After he was eased by the tenderness of her lips, she roused him again. It wasn't arduous or overly long, they were both already aware of each other intimately, and wanted to sate themselves. But Bethany took to it with a ravenousness that surprised him, brushing her nipples near his mouth until he suckled her, teasing him with their heft and softness. Only when they were both panting did she pull away. With red, heavy breasts, covered in his kisses, she brought her lips to him, brushing tantalizingly over the muscles of his stomach, tracing trails with her tongue to outline the indents and divots.  
  
He would have let her delve further, to take him in her mouth again, but he couldn't. The desire had grown too hot between them, and his cock pulsed whenever she neared it. Aching, wanting, so much he could hardly see straight, Keran let Bethany guide him until he was laying down on the blanket, the light of the sun dazzling his eyes.  
  
When she was ready, Bethany sat across his waist, straddling him. A nearly stifled moan escaped his throat, and he looked to see his own lust mirrored in her eyes. He held her still, though he desperately wanted to make the slight shift that would find him sheathed in her.  
  
"Beth..." He trailed off, unsure how to word what he wanted to say without ruining the moment. He wanted to say that he understood what she needed, what she wanted, that he wasn't normally so passive, that he wanted her to discover it all with him, but the words never came. He just settled for, "you're so beautiful." Barely managing to get those scant words out, his voice a low rasp.  
  
In the next moment, he was spearing past her gentle resistance, groaning as he pressed into the tight heat of her. She cried out on the first thrust, the sound morphing into a mewling noise as they kept going. He wanted to go faster, so much faster, to be greedy and simply take, but he let her set the pace.  
  
His thumb ventured into her cleft, and rubbing at her nub as she moved back and forth atop him. It was a blissful agony, the slow, steady rhythm of her pushing him deep into her sweet warmth and back out again. He could hear every hitch of her breathing, feel her walls clench in response to the pressure of his fingers, not quite moving anymore, but pressing, her movements causing the friction between his skin and hers. Her need made her speed up, tempo rubato, fast, then easing away from the speed, finding a rhythm comfortably slower until desire swept her again.  
  
Keran slid his other hand over her hip, caressing her, greedy fingertips wanting to touch every bit of her skin within reach. Bethany ground down on him without warning, her hips urging him to move more. Her climax was near, he could feel it in the tiny swells within her, the whimpers that she gave as she worked herself harder against him. Nothing was held back, and he let his thumb and forefinger pinch at her clit as he thrust into her again and again, hard and swift.  
  
His head swam with the closeness of it, the climax he felt, as if it were flowing through her to him. Shaking and moaning, Beth pushed herself once more onto him, the answering thrust toppling her, literally and figuratively. She didn't regain her balance as tremors of release overtook her, and anchored herself by clutching at his sides, as the delight pulled a ragged moan from her.  
  
Around him, she was tight, tortuously tight, folds closing in and sucking him deeper. He couldn't move, for fear he'd been pushed from her, feeling her climax as if it were his own. Bethany shone above him, her head thrown back in ecstasy, her body exalting the pleasure that coursed through it. With the sun in his eyes, and faint mewls of release still issuing from her, Keran let the end wash over him. It came like a great wave, he arcing into her at the very moment, and then pulling back.  
  
She collapsed forward, kissing his jaw, biting and nipping at chin and neck. Keran dragged a hand through her hair, feeling her hips moving slowly, working him through the release. He closed his eyes, letting her rain kisses on him, just feeling the gloriousness of her skin against his own until they both went still.  
  
Afterwards, she dropped a soft kiss on his lips. Keran thought she would settle onto the blanket next to him, but he never felt her lay down. He hadn't realized he'd closed his eyes until he opened them, right after hearing Bethany splash into the water.  
  
He was never going to turn down the chance to swim nude with a beautiful woman. Bethany was an unexpected delight indeed. Within moments, he was running to catch up with her, grateful for the cool water.  
  
Their walk back got them to Kirkwall just as the sun was setting, Keran with the nearly empty basket slung over one arm, holding hands with Bethany. She still smelled like sand and seawater as they walked, the only evidence of how they'd spent the afternoon. Grains of sand fell from her hair when he tangled his fingers in it, pulling her close for a kiss. Bethany scrunched her face as she shook the particles away, muttering about a shower.  
  
"I'll call you tonight." He promised her before they parted.  
  
"Or I can call you."  
  
"Whichever. I just wanted you to know I would." He said, smiling at her. Keran cupped a hand to the side of her face, burying his fingers in her thick hair. They kissed goodbye twice, and he let his hand slide down, and she caught it, squeezing it in hers before she let go.  
  
He waved as he walked away, silhouette shrinking as he headed towards Lowtown.  
  
Bethany smiled at the memory, letting it leave her mind as she searched for her ringing phone. It was Moira, a co-worker she'd recently befriended, but she let the call go. She was waiting for Keran to come and pick her up. She'd sent flowers ahead, but was still nervous as she waited. He was going to take her to meet his family for the first time - new nephew included. He'd already met Leandra, Carver and Merrill, stopping in when he picked her up for a date. Watching out the window, she saw him coming up the street to her house, and ran out to meet him, smiling up at him when he caught her in an embrace, brimming with the excitement of new love.


End file.
